• Welcome to this forum . We are a worldwide group with a common interest in Birmingham and its history. While here, please follow a few simple rules. We ask that you respect other members, thank those who have helped you and please keep your contributions on-topic with the thread.

    We do hope you enjoy your visit. BHF Admin Team

Lahai-roi The Grange 42 Park Hill Moseley

I Am Nico said:
I googled Loveday Hospital, it appears on a different Birmingham History site, it says it was for difficult births. Lahai Ro was not a hospital as far as I am aware, no babies were delivered there.
Click to expand...
thankyou Nico. The difficult births has me questioning, as we was told my dad had jaundice as a baby. My BG was sent from Derby to Lahai Roi mother and baby home. ive left my details with Norcap and have since rang Birmingham post adoption line. thankyou once again for your help.
 
My mother worked at Oakhurst Maternity home Sutton Coldfield in the late 50s/early 60s and told me that she used to accompany mothers and babies to Loveday st if there were birth complications.
 
Justmatt66 said:
Hello,
I was another child born at 42 Park Hill Road in February 1966
Click to expand...
I guess I would have been there when your birth mother was as I had my son in early December 1965. Do you know your birth mother’s name? Would love to contact someone who was there the same time as me
 
Christine1946 said:
I guess I would have been there when your birth mother was as I had my son in early December 1965. Do you know your birth mother’s name? Would love to contact someone who was there the same time as m
Click to expand...
Hello, yes I do know my birth mother’s name, but I’m afraid she doesn’t want to know me. Such is life 1748113402648.png
 
Justmatt66 said:
That’s not a problem it’s called life
Click to expand...
Maybe you could try again. With an intermediary. I heard of many in the same boat as you. One of my Norcap contacts who helped me was contacted by her birth mother who wanted to wait till or if her husband passed away. Which he did but she still did not tell her other children. She blamed it on their culture. It must rake up the past. It depends how you want to take it further. My cousin by marriage was a raised in an orphanage. He found his mother by accessing his records himself in the office. She did not want to know him but she did give him some information, His father was never told about him. There are so many different stories. Know that doesn't help you. I wish you well.
 
I Am Nico said:
Maybe you could try again. With an intermediary. I heard of many in the same boat as you. One of my Norcap contacts who helped me was contacted by her birth mother who wanted to wait till or if her husband passed away. Which he did but she still did not tell her other children. She blamed it on their culture. It must rake up the past. It depends how you want to take it further. My cousin by marriage was a raised in an orphanage. He found his mother by accessing his records himself in the office. She did not want to know him but she did give him some information, His father was never told about him. There are so many different stories. Know that doesn't help you. I wish you well.
Click to expand...
Thank you, but I won’t be trying again, to much pain involved.
 
I don't know your circumstances obviously but....I have a friend who found out that she had a brother before her mum married her dad. She has been trying to find him - we have been trying to find him.
 
I Am Nico said:
I don't know your circumstances obviously but....I have a friend who found out that she had a brother before her mum married her dad. She has been trying to find him - we have been trying to find him.
Click to expand...
I don’t think it’s me, I did make contact with my birth mother and she was in my life for just over a year, but things changed in my life and I was rejected, not sure I was ever going to be fully into her life, as her other children my half sisters didn’t want to know me.
 
We know it isn't you sadly, Justmatt. That is very disappointing for you.. Maybe they will one day.They might think they are protecting their mum or they don't want their boat rocked. I find too many like you in similar situations and several within my birth family. One, only one so far told me I was new to the family and it wasn't how THEY did things. I told them I was not new to the family, they just didn't know about me. I have an in law who doesn't want
their boat rocked but their spouse my half sibling, is still in close touch with me.
I was asked to help find a birth father for an elderly cousin and they narrowed it down to one family. But they need them to take a DNA test. The person who asked my help thinks it will break a few eggshells so I am watching from the wings. I was able to supply a photo so it might ease it a bit for him to look like other people. A half brother took several years to reply to me but he did. in the end. I hope you can get some comfort eventually, they might need time.
 
Incidentally, (for things that I have never properly addressed in my own case) do any fellow babies and Mothers from the Lahai Roi recall, or recall their birth mothers mentioning a Miss Young? She would have been involved meeting the prospective birth parents and Nurse Green or any of the nurses, and the cook? And were they aware of the two way mirror system in operation. Were any of the birth mothers told they would receive/did receive a photograph of the baby when they had settled in with their new families, were they expected to provide the baby clothes their baby was given away in and do they remember any of the other birth mothers? Twenty questions I know! Send me a PM if you would rather not send a public message. I would be most grateful for any snippets remembered. I was there end of 1957 and beginning of 1958.
 
Hi

i wonder if anyone may be able to point me in the right direction?

My birth mother stayed at park hill,,,,tho i was born in selly oak hospital.in april 1962...i have her name and area of where she was living as this was on my birth record

im trying to trace her birth certificate but can find no record of her at all

She was from ireland and returned there after my birth

Anyone know where i may be able to find this info?

Thank you for any info you may have

Matt
 
hi matt and welcome..someone else maybe able to advise better than i but if your birth mom was born in ireland then you need the irish records..there are some on ancestry but they are quite scant...however if you was adopted after your birth there could be more information about her in those...you would need to apply for your adoption papers..sorry i cant be of more help but as i said maybe someone else can advise you but it was common for single mothers to travel to england to give birth and then go back to ireland heartbroken that they had to give their babies up

lyn
 
Last edited:
Astoness said:
hi matt and welcome..someone else maybe able to advise better than i but if your birth mom was born in ireland then you need the irish records..there are some on ancestry but they are quite scant...however if you was adopted after your birth there could be more information about her in those...you would need to apply for your adoption papers..sorry i cant be of more help but as i said maybe someone else can advise you but it was common for single mothers to travel to england to give birth and then go back to ireland heartbroken that they had to give their babies up

lyn
Click to expand...
Hello Matt

I consulted my Irish friends of whom one is an adoptee. They told me you can ask at the libraries there. They went to their library in Carlow. I don't know if all libraries offer the same services there. Ours here did not when I was first searching 22 years ago. My friend here tells me she uses irishgeneaology.i.e. as our pjmburns advises. They tell me those records are free but only available up to about 1923/4 at the moment. They say Rootsireland is good but you have to pay for that one. My other friend here used Ancestry till it became too costly. I came across the site Find A Grave. That is worldwide. I found that useful. My Adoption records gave me things I did not already know which helped in the search. Best of luck. Nico
 
  • Appreciate
Reactions: cba
I had my baby in 1980, who was put into foster care because my parents wanted me to adopt my daughter. They would not allow me to return home with my child.
I had nowhere to live so social services put me into The Grange, I presumed until I found somewhere to live.
Neither the authorities or my parents could adopt my baby because I was 18, when I gave birth.
The Grange was run by nuns. The woman in charge was Ms Green. They made us attend church on Sundays, and I couldn’t understand how such religious woman could be so unkind.
They did make us do chores every day, but I was OK with that, it was just housekeeping.
After breakfast they made us put the babies in their prams and put them in the garden and we had to leave them there until WW completed our chores.
The night staff were not nuns, they were care workers and were friendly.
It was an unpleasant place to be in. Girls were visited by social workers. Private adoptions took place. Girls had babies one day and were then taken home by parents. Parents who didn’t want neighbours to see their pregnant daughter.
I was lucky, I was 18. I had the law on my side. And I gained mental strength and someone’s else’s social worker who helped me leave.
No mother was in The Grange by choice, from my experience young girls were traumatised. Social workers took the babies away, and the left.
Me and my daughter, who is now 45 and a solicitor, made it. I got back with her father when she was one year old. I have a happy ending because of my age at the time I gave birth, they could not force an adoption, they did try but somehow I was able to stop it.
I visited the house, years later but it had been turned into flats.
Because of what I went through and my lack of knowledge of my rights at the time, I trained as a solicitor and never wanted to be in position when I had to rely on someone else to tell me what my rights were.
The Grange had one purpose, to take babies, give them to social services for adoption.
 
I was in The Grange in 1981. Ms Green was in charge.
The nuns were very unfriendly. They didn’t speak to us unless they were giving instructions or telling us what to do. I was surprised by their lack of compassion especially as they were religious.
There was a girl, who did not have a child with her but who appeared to live there. She had her own room with posters of ABBA on the wall. We were not allowed to talk to her and she knew she was not allowed to talk to us. She never mixed with us, or did any chores. I happened to be put in a room directly opposite hers. She used to knock my door and whisper across the corridor, if a nun saw her she was told to get back in her room. This was a very odd situation. It didn’t last long as they moved me into a room in a different floor.
I Am Nico said:
Incidentally, (for things that I have never properly addressed in my own case) do any fellow babies and Mothers from the Lahai Roi recall, or recall their birth mothers mentioning a Miss Young? She would have been involved meeting the prospective birth parents and Nurse Green or any of the nurses, and the cook? And were they aware of the two way mirror system in operation. Were any of the birth mothers told they would receive/did receive a photograph of the baby when they had settled in with their new families, were they expected to provide the baby clothes their baby was given away in and do they remember any of the other birth mothers? Twenty questions I know! Send me a PM if you would rather not send a public message. I would be most grateful for any snippets remembered. I was there end of 1957 and beginning of 1958
Click to expand...
 
Kimeliza said:
I was in The Grange in 1981. Ms Green was in charge.
The nuns were very unfriendly. They didn’t speak to us unless they were giving instructions or telling us what to do. I was surprised by their lack of compassion especially as they were religious.
There was a girl, who did not have a child with her but who appeared to live there. She had her own room with posters of ABBA on the wall. We were not allowed to talk to her and she knew she was not allowed to talk to us. She never mixed with us, or did any chores. I happened to be put in a room directly opposite hers. She used to knock my door and whisper across the corridor, if a nun saw her she was told to get back in her room. This was a very odd situation. It didn’t last long as they moved me into a room in a different floor.
Kimeliza said:
I was in The Grange in 1981. Ms Green was in charge.
The nuns were very unfriendly. They didn’t speak to us unless they were giving instructions or telling us what to do. I was surprised by their lack of compassion especially as they were religious.
There was a girl, who did not have a child with her but who appeared to live there. She had her own room with posters of ABBA on the wall. We were not allowed to talk to her and she knew she was not allowed to talk to us. She never mixed with us, or did any chores. I happened to be put in a room directly opposite hers. She used to knock my door and whisper across the corridor, if a nun saw her she was told to get back in her room. This was a very odd situation. It didn’t last long as they moved me into a room in a different floor.
Click to expand...
My Birth mother lived there at one time after I was adopted as she had nowhere to go. So she scrubbed and cleaned for her keep till she got a job. She had stayed one night with one of the other discharged mums who lived with her own mother, but she felt they were poorer than she was so she went cap in hand to Miss Helmuth who was the only Nun there at that time. No compassion from Sister Helmuth, the opposite. I put on a previous post the some of parishioners of St Anne's looked down on the young mums, forced to attended the church services. The Reverend Yaxley's wife had a word with her husband who agreed to a condemnation of this in his sermon. I learned this from my Adoptive mum's friend, who then lived a few doors down, and ended up next door to my birth parents. My mum became friends with this lady years later. A GP attended and treated the girls with disdain. Plus the Trustees of the Lahai Roi who kept it going. She said the other nurses acted like nurses, but Sister Green was extra kind. The kindest person was the cook. There were no other staff bar a gardener, the girls cleaned the place themselves. My birth mother was shown kindness in the maternity hospital and the Birth Registrar who thought it disgusting the way they were treated. The disdain continued when my birth mother found lodgings nearby in Trafalgar Road and was thrown out buy her land lady who didn't want women of that ilk staying under her roof. She had owned a sealed letter addressed to my Birth Mother.
Click to expand...
 
Kimeliza said:
I had my baby in 1980, who was put into foster care because my parents wanted me to adopt my daughter. They would not allow me to return home with my child.
I had nowhere to live so social services put me into The Grange, I presumed until I found somewhere to live.
Neither the authorities or my parents could adopt my baby because I was 18, when I gave birth.
The Grange was run by nuns. The woman in charge was Ms Green. They made us attend church on Sundays, and I couldn’t understand how such religious woman could be so unkind.
They did make us do chores every day, but I was OK with that, it was just housekeeping.
After breakfast they made us put the babies in their prams and put them in the garden and we had to leave them there until WW completed our chores.
The night staff were not nuns, they were care workers and were friendly.
It was an unpleasant place to be in. Girls were visited by social workers. Private adoptions took place. Girls had babies one day and were then taken home by parents. Parents who didn’t want neighbours to see their pregnant daughter.
I was lucky, I was 18. I had the law on my side. And I gained mental strength and someone’s else’s social worker who helped me leave.
No mother was in The Grange by choice, from my experience young girls were traumatised. Social workers took the babies away, and the left.
Me and my daughter, who is now 45 and a solicitor, made it. I got back with her father when she was one year old. I have a happy ending because of my age at the time I gave birth, they could not force an adoption, they did try but somehow I was able to stop it.
I visited the house, years later but it had been turned into flats.
Because of what I went through and my lack of knowledge of my rights at the time, I trained as a solicitor and never wanted to be in position when I had to rely on someone else to tell me what my rights were.
The Grange had one purpose, to take babies, give them to social services for adoption.
Click to expand...
On a happy note for me, though I get on pretty much with my birth mother, most of the time, I am so lucky to have been adopted by the parents who adopted me. They were ordinary people but very special. I wouldn't change a thing. I feel privileged and lucky. I look at my birth siblings and they might have better careers and do a lot more things, but I think, I am sounder for it. Saying that my heart goes out to my fellow adoptees and their mothers who never had a choice. Religious doesn't mean good and the times were different and peoples' understanding was different. I hope some has changed for the good.
 
You must log in or register to reply here.
Back
Top