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Kitchen disasters.

G G Jean

G G Jean

Brummy Wench.
:cry: I made a trifle for my daughter in law with black cherries on top with anjelica as a decoration. I was about to take it round when I went to my unit. Out fell an opened packet or black pepper which covered my trifle and made it inedible. I could have cried. TTFN. Jean.:cry:
 
I feel soooo sorry for you Gee Gee Jean... I made a smashing cake years ago for my daughter's fourth birthday.... someone left the pantry door ajar (6 year old brother - pinching left over 'Smarties') and the cat ate all the pink icing off it.:cry: That too was made inedible, the cake not the cat.:biggrin:

Pom :angel:
 
So... we got married on the Saturday and moved into our 'new' home together that same evening, after our wedding reception.

We got up next morning and, after having to go to both our parents houses because we hadn't got a comb or a hairbrush between us (:rolleyes:), we set about preparing our first Sunday dinner together... roast beef, Yorkshire pudding, roast spuds and vegetables.

At this point, I have to admit to some trepidation because I'd eaten several times at my wife's parents' house and I wasn't over keen on their cooking... well, it just wasn't like my Mom's!

My new bride was rather nervous... she knew I had high expectations and didn't want to fail in the obvious comparison with my Mom's Sunday dinners, which she'd eaten and thoroughly enjoyed.

She didn't have anything to worry about... everything was perfect... all apart from one little thing... we'd forgotten to buy a wooden spoon for stirring the gravy!

Of course, she could've used a metal spoon, but didn't want to mark her shiny new Swan aluminium saucepans! In a blinding flash of inspiration, she remembered she'd been given a wooden spoon as a good luck token, along with horseshoes, etc., as she'd walked down the aisle the day before. So she peeled off the ribbon, washed and dried it and used it to stir what looked like delicious gravy... made just like my Mom had told her, using the juices from the beautiful joint of beef she'd cooked.

When it came to serving up, I carved (now being the man of the house and king of all I surveyed!) and she served it all up on our new plates. She poured the gravy over our dinners... lots for me because she knew I liked it swimming!

It was only when we started to eat that we discovered an unfamiliar flavour... one that neither of us could quite identify... almost like... perfume! It was then that we realised... the decorative wooden spoon was scented and, now, so was the bloody gravy! :(

My wife was beside herself, as you can imagine, and she shed a few tears. She was convinced the dinner was totally ruined, and she so wanted it to be perfect... and so it was. I was starving and there was no way I was going to let a little thing like perfumed gravy stop me from eating my favourite Sunday lunch!

I just scrapped as much of the gravy off the food as I could and tucked in... and it was perfect!

Sometimes you just have to be a man about these things, don't you! ;)

We still laugh about that little mishap now... 32 years later! :D
 
We were both working - I come back to the apartment and try to cook a steak for dinner - but burnt the damn thing - Stuart somewhat angry I threw an apple at him - he gets hold of me put me under the shower - needles to say we both ended up laughing
 
90% of all domestic accidents occur in the kitchen, I know I have to eat them........only joking.
 
:taste Onan. Was stirring my gravy tonight and couldn't stop thinking about your experience. Could almost smell it. Mind you I stirr mine with a whisk. [3 for a £1 from the £1 shop. :taste TTFN. Jean. Darby that wasn't very nice unless you do all the cooking. :redface:
 
Great reminiscences in these stories. Thanks for posting. My most memorable kitchen disaster from England took place decades ago. I was in Secondary school and taking the infamous cooking lessons or Domestic Science if you prefer. I was entrusted with making the Christmas Cake at home after making a rather good fruit cake at school. Mom was at work and I got on with all the weighing and cleaning of the fruit that one had to do years ago. I made the cake and cooked it perfectly using the grease proof butter wrappers to line the cake tin. I was very proud of the results.

I eased the cake out of the tin and put it on a plate in the top of our recently acquired kitchen cabinet...remember those stand alone units with a pull out at the front. I put it high up in the cupboard but forgot it was there and opened the doors to get some other item and down came the cake on to the floor. Smashed completely. I had to explain what happened to my Mom when she asked on coming home "Where is the cake":(
 
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In heaven I guess - never mind Jennyann I'm sure your mom forgave you. . .
 
Many years ago I bought a pressure cooker.
I read the manual,I was determined to make every menu it held.
A Rice pudding that would do for my first attempt.

Everything prepared.Put the washing out and it will be ready.

Linda ,in the garden next door ,had some juicy bits of gossip to impart.

I don't remember how long we chatted but I can remember how long it took to get rice pudding off the kitchen ceiling,worktops,cupboard doors,in fact everywhere.
 
Firemen for Sunday lunch

When i lived in Torquay i cut some fresh herbs to make some stuffing placed them in a tray and put them under the grill just to dry them off a tad, well yes i forgot and when i went into the kitchen the flames were leaping out of the cooker, i was so frightened i ran into the hall to call the firebrigade they arrived within ten minutes oxygen masks and all by this time i had managed to put out the fire and when i saw them i just burst into tears the chief fire officer comforted me and told me not to worry that these things happen he pulled the tray from underneath the grill out and said what's this your sunday dinner and he started to laugh, (there was a tiny scrap of fibre left) he was a brummie. they get everywhere don't they......Cat:)
 
nice try

Here's me thinking that men made the best cooks these days,:rolleyes: wonder where they do their cooking.:D:D:D What are the traffic statistics Alf...Cat:P
 
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Remembering the greats King Alfred only burnt the cakes once in 52 years on the throne and no record of him doing it again:D
 
Re Kitchen Disaster

alf,what about some one left the cake out in the rain.why on earth should any one put a cake out side in the first place?:D
 
burnt offerings

One day my eldest sister was looking after myself, brother and sister during the school holidays and while mum and dad were at work. Looking after meant making sure we had eaten before disappearing for the day. This one particular morning several slices of toast were under the grill and because we were arguing she forgot about the toast and tried to sort us all out. The next we knew was clouds of smoke and the pungent smell of burn toast, flames were actually coming from the grill. I had read that smothering flames extiguished a fire and the only thing to hand was a shovelful of dirt from the garden so I threw dirt on the toast and it worked, the flames went out. You would think that having saved the family and home from certain death and destruction my sister would have been grateful, not a bit. She pointed out, very pointedly, that all that was required was to take the grill pan from under the gas and blow the flames out. On top of this the toast was de-earthed, scraped and spread with jam and given to us as breakfast. A sign of the times meant nothing was wasted not even burnt offerings.
 
:sweat: The reasonAlf that brawimmin are always in the kitchen is because men don't know how to turn the gas [electric] on. Brawimmin make better cooks. TTFN. Jean. :sweat:
 
My culinary misfortune, many years ago when I was less lazy, was undetectable until (tried to-) eat. I am very fond of cheesecake and was not keen on the more reasonably-priced shop versions (they have improved nowadays). therefore i often made my own - gelatine, cream cheese, caster sugar etc. However (as I realised after), the caster sugar (which i did not often use) was in a large jar identical to that containing the cooking salt. It looked like a very nice cheesecake.
 
I was making gravy, grabbed the gravy granules and tipped them in without looking. My son said "you've just used Ovaltine!!" I tipped in some granules as well and no one noticed!
My Mum couldn't find string to tie round a bit of boiling bacon so she used elastic, ...that DID taste awful!
 
rosie said:
I was making gravy, grabbed the gravy granules and tipped them in without looking. My son said "you've just used Ovaltine!!" I tipped in some granules as well and no one noticed!
My Mum couldn't find string to tie round a bit of boiling bacon so she used elastic, ...that DID taste awful!
Click to expand...
My sister done that with drinking chocolate once, and everybody complimented the gravy
 
When we first were married I decided to make a triffle! Came to whisk the cream - no whisk. We improvised with Al's tool drill and a jug. Forgot to cover the jug, consequently the cream went all over us and the kitchen units - trifflw [what was left of it, wasn't a success]!

Yesteday made a triffle with frozen fruit - made the jelly to cover - as you do -. I forgot to defrost the fruit and with the water in the jelly, the liquid did not set. Tonight we take our triffle with a straw!!!!! Triffl and do not mix!!!!!!!!!!! Miriam.
 
Salty cheesecake Mike. Miriam this is one made with frozen berries and I did let the fruit thaw out first and put in two jellies. Mom Jamaican friend made a trifle once and she just mixed the lot together. Mom taught her how to do it and she in turn taught mom how to cook fish Jamaican style. Jean.
 
It would have been around 1980 and my first Mrs decided we would have a goose for Christmas dinner. In goes the 14 lb goose a.m Christmas day, it had cost a fortune.
Halfway through cooking the electric cooker blew up. Had to go to the stepsons house 5 miles away to finish the roasting. We had cold meats on Boxing day. Never again.
 
About 25 years ago l left my husband and boys to eat supper alone as l had a meeting to go to....Ron has never been any good in the kitchen and l always complained about coming home to a sink full of dishes....well this particular night he loaded the dishwasher and pressed the start button just as l came back, l asked what detergent did you use he said the dishwashing detergent you use....any one who has a dishwashing machine knows thats not what you use.....you can imagine what happened after l opened the dishwasher up l had soapsuds everywhere,after scooping the suds out l put it on the rince cycle which only man it worse, by then we had suds everywhere all over the kitchen floor etc, l took the dishes out and washed them the oldfashion way, by then it was midnight l gave up and went to bed knowing l had the cleanest dishes in town and a m/c full of soap suds,...the following morning l phoned the manufacturers for help the reply was simple all l had to do was put a spoon full of cooking oil in the washing m/c and it would have killed the suds immediatley, Ron learned his lesson then but l can honestly say he never did again or wash the dishes since.....he is a complete disaster in the kitchen Rond only culinery skills are making tea and toast.......Brenda
 
Oh dear Brenda at least he tried I suppose?. Pete does wash up but very rarely cooks and that is usually toast that he manages to burn. Jean.
 
You get similar results if you put ordinary washing powder, in an automatic washing machine
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