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Christmas presents best ,worst ,and inappropriate

berniew

master brummie
Hello everyone it's that time of year so merry Christmas and a happy new year . Does anyone have any memories or stories about their best ,worst or inappropriate Christmas presents given or received Bernie
 
The first year after I got married, my brother-in-law gave me a gift set of after-shave. A few days later we visited him, and I thanked him for the present. Perhaps I shouldn't have been stoking my beard as I did so!
 
When I was about 22 and sporting a full ZZ-Top style beard, my great-aunt bought me an electric shaver! It wasn't that she never saw me - she visited regularly and I think she was trying to drop a none-too-gentle hint, the dear old soul. It stayed in the drawer for about 5 years until the beard came off - good shaver, too. A Philishave, and it lasted the best part of 30 years.

Big Gee

PS: just seen Lloyd's post!!!
 
Bernie for once in my life I am stumped for an answer but will sleep on it. Mind you been out and had a couple of wines. Good topic though. Jean.
 
My daughter's boyfriend bought her a giant slipper you know the type; one you can get both feet in.
She dumped him.
 
Hi All

Probably the worst Christmas present I've ever had was a turkey plate given by my now ex husband, and it wasn't even a nice one it was brown and white, bought from the market I think !! I did have a tape recorder from Santa, which was good but didn't have any batteries and I had to wait a week or so to get some. I had a Sindy's bed which by tea time on Christmas Day had both legs broken - after a couple of pints of Brew XII my Dad trod on it !! The best thing was a doll with all the clothes and a pram to go with it :-)
 
My (now ex) wife wasn't impressed with the lawn mower I gave her one year - well, she did do the gardening...
 
How long have we got. Michael has bought me a set of saucepans, vacuum cleaner, garden shears, tumble dryer........I did notice those who had received rubbish presents referred to previous husbands and dumped boyfriends..........um I wonder if this is where I went wrong! Mind you now I get jewelery!
 
Last Christmas my wife asked for something with diamonds in it so I bought her a pack of cards .


Mike
 
Hello Berniew. One of our presents from a'good friend'? as a "Wooppy Cushion and a bag of crisps.". Enough said. M
 
At the age of eleven I was roller skating mad and went to the Embassy roller rink on Waldorf Road at least once a day. There I had to use crap hire skates, so that year I asked Santa for some new roller skates of my own. My mum secretly bought me some skates well before Christmas and hid them away in there box. Now I knew all her little hiding places and each day before my mum got home from her work at the BSA, Small Heath, I would take them out of the box and go skating on the Stoney Lane, that was paved with large flagstones, then put them carefully back in there hiding place.

Christmas day very early Santa came into my room with the usual pillow case full of nuts, mandarin oranges and my 'new' skates that were by now almost worn down to the axles! lol

Even so that was the best Christmas present that I've ever had.

Graham.
 
At 11 years of age and like Graham I had the nuts etc but i also had a Philips bicycle which I used to go everywhere disappear for hours parents used to send out search parties wore the tyres out eventually had it took off me because of all the problems but still the BEST
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Hello all my best childhood present was a five gear B S A racing bike when I was about 12 years old bought from Craigs cycle shop on Bordesley Green ,my worst a pair of football boots ,but not the sleek low cut pair I was expecting but black with a brown toecap pre Mathews style. My street cred was in tatters till July. Loved the lawnmower and the playing cards , regards Bernie
 
Just a thought but why did you girls , disappointed by spouses boyfriends etc , put up with it when there were romantics of the caliber of Lloyd and MSGK around ? regards Bernie
 
Christmas presents....how long we got?
I had a present off my nan a long time ago which had the sellotape in it.
Another time I got to the end of my sack at the end of the bed (I was about 12) and the last present I opened was my first bra, I nearly died with embarrassment.
My mother used buy anything but Aston Villa, I hated all those girly presents. One year when I was in my early thirties she brought me a Villa sweatshirt, I was over the moon, she said she got fed up of looking at my face year after when I had been so disappointed with her presents.
 
What with the jewelery playing cards celotape and bra's I have to say the best Christmas present was my grandaughter born Christmas eve. Afraid that Christmas was put on hold slightly but we all got stuck in. My best ever gift was a musical box [which I still have] sent from Tripoli when my brother was doing his national service. It came in plenty of time and mom had hidden it in the LOCKED wardrobe. It has a balet dancer that twirls round to Oh my pappa. Jean.
 
In answer to your question - I lived in Hope - for better things.


My best present was when my boyfriend then [now husband] gave me a Vanity Case with two tickets inside for the show 'My fair Lady' and a trip to the boat show. M
 
Firstly, My Mother imprinted on me that household items were not presents...so guess what, I made that very clear to my husband when I got married. I'm not one much for expensive presents. We exchange very small items and try to give each other the present of happiness on as many days as we can throughout the year. For example: Hubby brings me coffee, the newspaper and the TV turned to the News Channel every morning. Takes me out for lovely meals, etc. Since we both work at home this works.

I do remember my best one when I was a kid though, a bicycle made especially for me when I was l2. Mom worked for Sun Cycles at Aston Brook. I rode hundreds of miles on this bike until years later the Rag & Bone man nipped in the side door of our house and took it away. How I know, a neighbour spotted him. It had run it's course so he was welcome to it. We had a right of way beside our house and you could look through or over the fence. That's how he saw it.

I know Mom had an embarrassing moment when she worked at Sun Cycles.
She worked with a maiden lady and gave her special facial shaving lotion
instead of her favourite bath soap! She never forgot that.
 
Last year i bought my wife a set of screw drivers......only for a laugh

Mossy
 
Lloyd same difference. I had a new gas cooker last year after I passed comment about it in the store. Mind you the regulator had gone on my other and we had changed the work tops. Jean.
 
My dear wife Paula was complaining that the vacuum cleaner had seen better times so I thought that I would surprise her with a top of the range up-right Dyson vacuum cleaner for Christmas........ I wrapped it and put ribbons all around it and waited for her Christmas morning expression of shear delight........... But what did I get....... Gratitude. Noooooooo.

Just a face as long as Livery Street. I just don't understand women??????????

Mabz
 
Ray was only telling me this morning about the christmas present his mother sent out to the Canal Zone in Suez when he was doing his National Service, a home baked cake, biscuits, socks and a bottle of COD LIVER OIL, I couldn't stop laughing.
 
Hello everyone thanks for replies i would like to wish everyone a merry christmas and a happy and prosperous new year and i hope Santa brings everyone what they want best wishes Bernie
 
bernie, please dont, I love food but not deer pate or santa sossies.
 
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Stitcher did you join the bah humbug club , befriend a hoodie or did some poor tormented soul on their last day at Woolworth's slip it into your bag Bernie
 
Berniew, if you knew me you wouldnt even ask that. I never complain/moan. I am aways happy and I always see the better side of people. so I havent a clue who would have sent me such a thing. I have tried to get in Normas good books for awhile but she was being nasty so I thought it may have been her. However she issued a statement recently and apparantly the stumbling block is the fact that I am married, it seems she likes me really so I wouldnt think it was her.
 
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