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Fridge message for your pets.

Sakura

master brummie
Hope you enjoy this, I could certainly relate to it. :) Mo
[FONT=tahoma, new york, times, serif]Dear Pets, and thence, Pet Owners,
(The following was found posted very low on a refrigerator door).
Dear Dogs and Cats: The dishes with the paw prints are yours and contain
your food. The other dishes are mine and contain my food.
Placing a paw print in the middle of my plate and food does not stake a claim for it becoming
your food and dish, nor do I find that aesthetically pleasing in the
slightest.
The stairway was not designed by NASCAR and is not a racetrack. Racing me to
the bottom is not the object. Tripping me doesn't help because I fall
faster than you can run.
I cannot buy anything bigger than a king sized bed. I am very sorry about
this. Do not think I will continue sleeping on the couch to ensure your
comfort. Dogs and cats can actually curl up in a ball when they sleep. It is
not necessary to sleep perpendicular to each other, stretched out to the
fullest extent possible. I also know that sticking tails straight out and having
tongues hanging out on the other end to maximize space is nothing but
sarcasm.
For the last time, there is no secret exit from the bathroom! If, by some
miracle, I beat you there and manage to get the door shut, it is not
necessary to claw, whine, meow, try to turn the knob or get your paw under the edge in
an attempt to open the door. I must exit through the same door I entered.
Also, I have been using the bathroom for years - canine/feline attendance is
not required.
The proper order for kissing is: Kiss me first, then go smell the other dog
or cat's butt. I cannot stress this enough.

Finally, in fairness, dear pets, I have posted the following message on the
front door:
TO ALL NON-PET OWNERS WHO VISIT AND LIKE TO COMPLAIN ABOUT OUR PETS:
(1) They live here. You don't.
(2) If you don't want their hair on your clothes, stay off the furniture.
That's why they call it 'fur'-niture.
(3) I like my pets a lot better than I like most people.
(4) To you, they are animals. To me, they are adopted sons/daughters who are
short, hairy, walk on all fours and don't speak clearly.
Remember, dogs and cats are better than kids because they
(1) eat less,
(2) don't ask for money all the time,
(3) are easier to train,
(4) normally come when called,
(5) never ask to drive the car,
(6) don't hang out with drug-using people;
(7) don't smoke or drink,
(8) don't want to wear your clothes,
(9) don't have to buy the latest fashions,
(10) don't need a gazillion dollars for college and
(11) if they get pregnant, you can sell their children.

[/FONT]​
 

Alberta

Super Moderator
Staff member
Love it.

I can relate to No.3,I have a lovely painting of a Yorkie and underneath it says 'The more I see of people the more I love my dog'.
 
R

rustie

Guest
Hi Sakuru

I think thats really good. Whenever I open my fridge my little dog peers in it as well. Doesn't take anything just has a good luck. Not very hygenic I know, but I feel some dogs are cleaner than some people. Our dog sleeps by the side of the bed and will only sleep on my old dressing gown. But he is worth everything a child that never grows up. Although growing old now am afraid nearly 14

rustie
 

Rupert

master brummie
Great post. It's usually the cat on the stairway for me and he does not follow me into the bathroom in the morning...rather shows me the way. I think he knows the routine that leads to breakfast for him. The pug Rupi waits and does not jump down from the bed and come into the kitchen untill he hears the tinkle of kibble in the dish. Unfortunately the cat really wants to communicate in the mornings and insists on lying on the table on top of the newspaper...he's realy friendly then.
Hmm...move your bum over Jasper...I want to eat that mushroom...animals, you have got to love them...er...maybe.
 

Sakura

master brummie
We know how you feel Norma. Went to funeral yesterday, do you believe in black. Took long to get the cat hairs off me than walk to the church.
Rupert that sounds like our house except to have 4 on the table might stop us eating. One sits on the top stair to the basement and now I have learned to look when I take the washing down. lol
When I heard from Brenda yesterday I wondered whether you were ok, glad you are. Cheers.:) Mo
 
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G G Jean

Brummy Wench.
I have just sat down and read it right through this time Mo and I can relate to all of it over the years. Alberta we too have a very old photo picked up in Bewdley market of a Jack Russell with a rat at his feet. It is entitled conscious pride. I wonder what the little dogs name was and where he lived?. Have just bought a fridge magnet of a paw. Jean.
 

kaz

master brummie
Really enjoyed this!
Though am still working on the "normally come when called" part...my pup is just like the kids and has selective hearing . Is only interested in coming if there's food involved:)
 

Sakura

master brummie
I think that can be catching, as a lot of husbands seem to be like that as well. :) Mo
 

Rupert

master brummie
KAZ, if there is a place that does dog obedience classes near to you it's well worth taking your pup on a course whilst he/she is young. The courses that we went on did not cost a lot and were worth the effort. You will find that treats are most of it realy. The dog will benefit from socialising with other canines also.
 

kaz

master brummie
Thanks for the advice Rupert - Will look into it as soon as the snow melts and the nicer days are here.
She sits, lies down, will wait to eat something or go somewhere and will stay just about all the time but like i mentioned before the command "come" is still a work in progress:rolleyes:
 
B

Beryl M

Guest
Just love animals they all have a personality of their own - Very often much nicer than some people -Just hope their is an animal heaven. . .
 

Duggy

proper brummie kid
Sakura, Thanks for making us laugh so much. I can relate to how much room a cat needs. Polly starts off curled up and eventually requires half of the settee to herself.
 

Sakura

master brummie
Duggy - If some of our cats are on any of the chairs it is very difficult to encourage them to move with out picking them up. When we move from the chairs they are on them so fast you can't sit down again.
Sometimes they will share.
 
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